Because this is what's probably going to happen sooner or later!

Nash was mauled by a 200-pound adult chimpanzee named Travis, owned by her friend and employer Sandra Herold. Paramedics responding to a 911 call said they found pieces of Nash's fingers strewn on the floor and her hands looked as though they had been through a meat grinder.

"The monkey had ripped off her entire upper jaw, had ripped off her nose, which as hanging by a thread," said Dr.Kevin Miller, who treated Nash when she taken to the emergency room. "We found extensive dirt, chimp fur, and chimp teeth implanted in her bone."
Nash is missing both hands, but had a thumb surgically replaced on her left hand. Doctors removed her eyes and grafted a piece of her leg to where her nose used to be.

"I'm not a candidate for a hands transplant because I have no eyesight. I hope somewhere along the way to get a face transplant and get a hand transplant at the same time," she said.

People look at the cute chimp and when they are told that this little guy that's half your size could easily RIP YOUR FUCKING ARM AND HANDS OFF they think it's a gross exageration.

No, it's not. Chimps are visious cunts, don't let that cute look fool you. Visious cunts strong enough to RIP LIMBS OF YOU as easy as you can snap your fingers.

Everytime I see some show with a cute chimp for laughs I cringe and what could _easily_ have happened.

"Lamonica told the detectives that he drank cat blood and poured it on the bodies of his young victims."

This is one of the cases where the death penalty seems not quite enough.

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NEW ORLEANS - The first of seven members of a now-defunct church accused of raping children as part of a devil-worshipping ritual was found guilty of molesting his 2-year-old daughter and a boy. ADVERTISEMENT

A state district court jury in Amite on Monday convicted Austin "Trey" Bernard III in the rape of his daughter as well as the rape of a 12-year-old boy, prosecutor Scott Perrilloux said.

Bernard, 39, denied the charges, but three earlier confessions and a journal that seemed to detail the practices of the group were too much to overcome, said Al Bensabat, the public defender who represented him.

"Once the jury read that it was all over," Bensabat said Tuesday.

Bernard, who faces a mandatory life prison term without parole when he is sentenced on Jan. 12, was being held in jail on Tuesday.

No trial date has been set for the remaining six defendants. Perrilloux said he anticipates bringing the former minister of Hosanna Church, Louis Lamonica, to trial in early 2008. Lamonica has pleaded not guilty.

The allegations have rocked the small town of Ponchatoula, about 40 miles northwest of New Orleans.

The activities at the church became known when Lamonica walked into the Livingston Parish Sheriff's Department and asked to speak with a detective in 2005, Chief of Detectives Stan Carpenter said.

For almost two hours, Lamonica, 49, told investigators how he and other church members had molested children, and taught them to have sex with each other, as well as with a dog, authorities said.

Lamonica told the detectives that he drank cat blood and poured it on the bodies of his young victims.

"We were totally stunned," Carpenter said.

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Source: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071205/ap_on_re_us/church_sex_abuse